Toxic Relationships

It appears that Sunday's sermon is stirring up conversations about toxic relationships. For those of you not in worship, we are continuing in our sermon series in Matthew 10, where Jesus calls his disciples into a relationship and then sends them out on mission. The primary passages were: Matthew 10:11-15, and 10:40-42. When a person is made right before God through Jesus Christ, he/she is called a righteous person. In the text Jesus talks about righteous people and worthy people. Like righteous folks, worthy people are hospitable, open, respectful and view the world as larger than themselves. Worthy people simply do not have the relationship with God. Jesus calls us to be in partnership with and in mission to worthy individuals. Check out verses 40-42 to see how God responds to the worthy person. Jesus does give the warning about staying away from toxic people.

Toxic individuals hinder our relationship with God. If we are around negative friends, then we tend to become negative. If we grew up in a house filled with shame and secrets, we keep parts of our lives hidden from God's healing. If we never heard how much God loves us, then our identity is found in whatever idol presents itself-- work, kids, house, relationships, promotion.

Accordingly this passage seeks to pull from within us those areas which are toxic. When do I laugh at someone elses expense? When do I judge someone else, only to discover on closer examination that very characteristic within me? How often do I blame others because I simply can't cope with another failure?

Matthew's gospel is not for the faint of heart. Remember... this is the Gospel of Jesus. There is good news. I believe John the Baptist said it best: Repent for the Kingdom of Heaven is near. Repent. Confess the areas where toxicity resides in you. Let God's forgiveness and grace heal the broken heart.

On a side note. I got into a conversation about how this works in terms of political humor. The question was, "At what point do I become toxic in my humor?" A timely question. In the last election I felt very convicted in this area. I love a good political cartoon. They are concise and speak volumes through art. As I lifted the question to God I heard the following: Stay away from personal attacks against an individual. All people are my (God's) creation. Imagine if you were in that person's shoes. How would you feel if the personal attack was against you and your children heard it? Let that be your guide.

For me that has served as a guide in two ways. First a commitment to not participate or pass on personal attacks--funny or otherwise. Also I heard a call to speak up when someone is targeting a politician in such ways. I have to admit this has not always been very easy for me. I have had to work harder at understanding the issues rather than the soundbites.

On the journey,
Alecia